Just to really stick it to me, my right breast is red and swollen and burning hot thanks to a bite I recieved as a parting gift from Grub at bedtime last night.
Because, you know, the universe was worried it hadn’t fucked with me enough.
I feel like death but actually surprisingly cheerful for someone whose right tit looks like exploding.
It’s the sunshine. I can’t stay mad at the universe when the sun is shining.
Also, the Grub, despite feeding like a rabid piranha, is soooooooo cute at the moment.
She came out with a new word today which illustrates just beautifully that she is a [insert surname here].
“Bum”. Clear as a bell, perfectly articulated, on demand.
She’s one of us. Only just 15 months old today and she’s saying “bum”. That’s my girl.
Also, operation sleep-in-own-bed is going well, really well.
So, despite the mastitis, and the pelvis and my thumb and other assorted maladies, fuck you right back universe!