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Poor Time Management and Running, Running, Running

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I’m not keeping on top of things. I am trying to push myself as hard as I can during the day. I am still struggling with the concept that I can’t do things. Of course, I try to protect my body as much as I can but I just get so frustrated with the mess and the jobs left undone and, and. I think I’m trying to claw back just a bit of functionality, the amount of pain medication it takes for me to do that is immense but I suppose that’s just how it is. I am seeing the private pain sepcialist on September the 8th and I am just hoping, hoping, hoping that he will have some new ideas, my GP desperately wants someone to share the responsibility with, she’s a nervous wee thing.

Over the last couple of weeks I have written several part blog posts, I just never quite get the time, or  I suppose, the time and energy in combination to complete them. I have been missing my online life so much, I have to try harder to pull the time and energy from somewhere.

Skunky’s birthday was mostly good, the cake was really cool, if somewhat disturbing. What can you do though, when your six-year-old wants a zombie head on a plate for his birthday cake? He triumphantly chopped the head in half, shortly after this, to reveal the bright red contents.

I managed, with the aid of a bucket of painkillers, to keep myself going throughout. As a result of my charming mother I ended up in my room with a friend having a little weep. I always forget her capacity to be completely self-centred,  it’s wishful thinking that makes me believe she’ll be kind or helpful or supportive. Thanks to my lightning fast brain I had my retribution. I forgot her birthday yesterday until about six o’clock when I noticed that people had been sending their well-wishes via facebook. I had even been texting her throughout the day so it just shows how talented my brain is, I think perhaps Brain did it on purpose. Did you Brain? It never answers me, bastard.

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Finally the warm weather is making an appearance. Skunky had been agitating for a visit to the spooky trees (immense Moreton Bay Fig trees in Botanic Park) so we headed there for a picnic on Sunday with Poss, Skunky and Gecko (Rhubarb declined on the grounds that he would rather be alone at home and we suck, which was nice, 15’s a golden age). It was lovely and the kids had a ball climbing around on the tangle of roots.

And running. There’s something so beautiful about watching Gecko run, she’s very graceful, for a girl of 3, graceful and fearless. I adore this picture. I was watching her run with her hair trailing behind her and I had to capture it.

And now, I’ve done something terrible to my left shoulder (the bad shoulder) in the act of typing and if I don’t stop I fear it will fall off. Pain relief, here I come.

 

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9 responses

  1. Your body might suck but the talent you possess is amazing. I don’t even like zombies and I want a cake like that too. My boy (the girl too I am sure!) would go nuts getting to chop up a head for a birthday cake. Of course all the pc parents around here would be mortified but it would be totally worth it!

    Fingers crossed for a happy body this week and a positive trip to the pain specialist.

    • Thank you, I know, I half feared I would get some disapproving comments about it here! I love making cakes, if only my hands and other bits would stand up to doing more than one every few months! xxx

  2. I’m sorry the pain is so bad at the moment., You know I understand, am in the same place. I hope the appt brings some help? A little hope?

    Those moreton bay figs – amazing, aren’t they? And that photo of Gecko running! Amazing, beautiful pic!

    Here (email) if you want to talk. I’m going to be in(on the) bed all day. Not good for much else.

    • It makes such a difference to have people who really get it, although I wish you weren’t going through the same thing. We need to skype I think, I’m on bed rest today, I need to try and get things under control. I’ll try and get a hold of you on twitter. x

  3. Bleh. I’m running on adrenaline and stress at the moment I think, wound so tightly that nothing much is dislocating, but the pain is, ugh. xxx

    • I know the feeling well, it’s very hard to break out of a cycle of pain and intense muscle spasm though. I’m fixated on the idea of having massage but I’m scared that I’ll be injured, it’s very easy for someone to press on the wrong place and then….

  4. That cake is AWESOME! Seriously! Gecko is beautiful. I’m really glad you’re seeing that private pain guy soon. He better bloody well come through and not pull yet more BS on you or he’ll be answering to the Internet!

    • Thank you love. I was very pleased with the cake although I was completely wrecked after making it! I am pinning my hopes on the pain guy, I fear to get my hopes up but then again I have to be optimistic about something or I’ll drown in a sea of self pity. x

  5. I love you.

    I LOVE that cake.

    I love your brain for giving your own personal MOTY a taste of her own medicine.

    I love your pain killers for helping you achieve all that you have managed.

    x

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